Filling My Hole

I can’t blame the extra twenty pounds on not smoking because I gained the first stress eating before I’d even stopped killing myself. The second ten were packed on while I tried to fill the hole in my soul during the first three weeks of rehearsal – the hole formed by leaving all my friends and family, uprooting my life and embarking on a new adventure, which can be quite stressful…

I’m currently back on track, feel like I’ve now got it under control and am doing quite well.

Now, the hole in my soul is being filled with the new friends I’ve made – my cast is quite giving – good times, and the satisfaction of doing my job and doing it well. I feel I can be myself here, and I almost feel like I won’t get fired… I still have quite a ways to go though, looking at pictures from rehearsals and seeing “fat-Vinnie” instead of “skinnie-Vinnie” is still quite disturbing. I don’t like feeling good about everything else and having my pants be tight!